October 5, 2008

It's been an ok day...

We brought Ashley to the airport this morning to meet with her case worker and the other lady that was traveling with them. Her case worker was a little stressed and just wanted to get going. I helped her load Ashley's clothes into the extra suitcases that they brought and then went with them up to the check in counter. I said my goodbyes.
Of course I cried, and Ashley just smiled her sweet little smile and giggled at me. She was excited by all the stuff going on around her. My only saving grace was that I knew that she didn't even realize what was going on. She'll go back to her previous foster home and it will be just like before for her. I was wrong when I had badmouthed them about keeping her in her wheelchair all the time. I honestly think that for her own safety she should probably be in it. She doesn't feel pain and flails around, hitting herself on everything and everyone. She also doesn't see well and that makes for more injuries. She hated being in her wheelchair here because the other kids were free to play and she wasn't. In her foster home there are 12 kids in wheelchairs so she's just like everyone else. They also have 6 adults there to care for them and they all adore Ashley because she's the youngest.
My friend Yvonne and her husband, the ones that adopted Ashley's brother Joshua, are going to try and see if they can have her come to their house for a weekend visit or two. They want to see how she does and if adopting her is something they can do. Joshua has an aid that comes and helps them out, and since they are also in Texas, they will be able to get one for Ashley. I really hope they can swing it but it's definitely a tough decision to make.
I've been so overwhelmed and stressed out since she got here from trying to decide how to make it work that I've neglected my house. I have been cleaning since I got home this morning. I think my way of dealing with defeat is to accomplish something I can be proud of. I got my entire bedroom uncluttered and cleaned. I moved the piano to a place where I can use it to start piano lessons with the kids again. I got the kids' beds washed and remade. I vacuumed and swept the whole main floor and had the kids organize their toys. Now I'm waiting for Desperate Housewives to come on so I can sit and fold my laundry and get lost in it :o)


  1. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you and Ashley today. I'm glad that she got off okay. I'll be praying that Yvonne and her family can get some time with her to see if they are her forever family. I'll just keep praying for Ashley though. Sending big ((HUGS)) your way, because I know this was tough for you all the way through.

  2. I am glad your day went OK. Give those kiddos a hug from us, OK?

    Take care of yourself. :-)

  3. I am glad that you are going to get some Desperate Housewives therapy! :-) I think you should add a bottle of wine and a bubble bath too!

    I hope you'll take some r & r after the big cleanup is over. LOL! I know just how you feel, I always clean for a fresh start, to feel accomplished and "normal"(for me that is), I am big into "normal". Big (((HUGS)))...

  4. I've been thinking of you a lot...mostly because my MOM has been reading your blog and keeping me filled in when I haven't been by a computer. (Isn't that crazy? Your blog got saved in her favorites while I was using her computer one day and now she reads it all the time.) Anyhow, I know this was tough for you. And I'm sorry you had to go through it. Take extra good care of yourself, and there are big hugs from us waiting for you next time we see you.